thefilthycomma #20

I've just found a list of things scrawled on a post-it note. It is entitled 'Things That Make Me Happy' and the first thing on the list is 'The opening sequence of Baywatch'. I don’t think it’s possible to explain Baywatch to the uninitiated, so see for yourselves what I'm talking about. The other items on my list were as follows: Glenn Miller; assorted sacred music ('esp. Verdi' I have added later in another colour); My Family and Other Animals, which I must have read thirty times and never get bored of; Jim Cain; kilner jars and the things in them; an old passport photograph of my father, now sadly lost in the mists of time (the photograph, not Father. Father was allowed out unsupervised to take passport photographs in a booth, and I can only assume that the flash took him by surprise as he appears to be recoiling from the screen as if he has been kicked on the shin, affording the camera an unparalleled view of the inside of his nostrils); and finally, 'the food P keeps in his pockets', which can be anything from coughsweets to pies.

© David Scoins 2017